Healthy Relationships

Not that I have the success to be giving relationship advice, but just some thoughts from some experience and things I have seen.

Lets take a look at some general strategies that will help you make healthy relationship decisions:
-Go to God
-Pray for guidance in the relationship
-Choosing to have equal relationships
-When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water...
-Taking your time and choosing your partner wisely
-Not losing yourself in your relationship
-Setting and enforcing appropriate boundaries and limits
-Having reasonable expectations of your partner and of what a relationship can provide you
-Not making assumptions
-Not confusing the present with the past
-Taking responsibility for your own feelings, reactions, and projections
-Working on developing your empathy skills
-Agreeing to disagree and taking time-outs
-Learning conflict resolution and fair fighting techniques*

Women, I strongly encourage you to read Redeeming Love that I talked about in my previous post.  And Men, I encourage you to read Wild at Heart.  (I also think it would be good for each of you to read the other book but let's not get ahead of ourselves).

And some encouragement for women:
I am not letting men off the hook. God knows, we have a lot more repenting to do. I am saying that you won't begin to understand the long and sustained assault on femininity, on women, until you see it as part of something much larger. The most wicked force the world has ever known. The Enemy bears a special hatred for Eve. If you believe he has any role in the history of this world, you cannot help but see it.

The Evil One had a hand in all that has happened to you. If he didn't arrange for the assault directly-and certainly human sin has a large enough role to play-then he made sure he drove the message of the wounds home into your heart. He is the one who has dogged your heels with shame and self-doubt and accusation. He is the one who offers the false comforters to you in order to deepen your bondage. He is the one who has done these things in order to prevent your restoration. For that is what he fears. He fears who you are; what you are; what you might become. He fears your beauty and your life-giving heart.

You really won't understand your life as a woman until you understand this:

You are passionately loved by the God of the universe.
You are passionately hated by his Enemy.

And so, dear heart, it is time for your restoration. For there is One greater than your Enemy, One who has sought you out from the beginning of time. He has come to heal your broken heart and restore your feminine soul.

(Captivating , 89-91)

*My girlfriend Candice had a blog about relationships and I took almost all of those from her.

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